When we talk about retiring from a long professional life, we often imagine it as a moment of pure joy and relief. And yes, it can absolutely feel like that.
But I know from my own experience – and from countless conversations with friends, readers, and clients – that there’s often something else, too.
Even when we’re ready. Even when it’s the right time. Even when we’re excited about what’s ahead.
We can still feel a pang of sadness. An ache for what we’re leaving behind.
How is it possible to feel so proud and grateful for the road we’ve travelled… and yet feel so tender about stepping away from it?
The complexity of big transitions
During my coaching work – and especially through my training in grief coaching – I’ve come to see this more clearly.
Our minds are adept at seeking simple answers and clean categories.
We like things to fit neatly: happy or sad. Strong or weak. Moving on or staying stuck.
But that’s not how real life works.
That’s not how big transitions feel.
The truth I keep seeing, both in my clients’ and friends’ journeys and my own, is that it’s entirely normal to carry mixed emotions.
We can feel deep gratitude for a long, fulfilling career – and at the same time grieve the routines, relationships, and roles that gave our lives shape for so many years.
We can be hopeful and excited about retirement, while also feeling a little lost or even scared about what’s next.
What helps during our transition?
Here are some simple ways to stay grounded in this mix of emotions:
#1 – Acknowledge the full range of feelings
Try not to judge or rush them. You might say to yourself, “This is a big change. It’s natural to feel many things at once.”
#2 – Celebrate what’s behind you
Reflect on the work, relationships, and contributions you’re proud of. Write them down or create a small ritual to honour this chapter.
#3 – Stay curious about what’s ahead
Retirement isn’t the end. It’s the beginning of a new chapter, one you get to shape intentionally around what matters most to you now.
#4 – Give yourself time
Adjusting takes a while. There’s no right timeline for finding your rhythm in retirement.
And whenever life feels uncomfortable, remind yourself that both can be true:
You can love where you’re going. AND you can miss where you’ve been.
You don’t have to pick one. Just notice and accept both feelings.
That’s how you honour your journey and step gently, intentionally, into what’s next.
I wish you a great trip! 😊